Good speech

Speech is an exclusive gift given to human beings. It is obvious that one who uses this gift appropriately is most benefitted. However speech is often misused or over used. Most of our problems could have been avoided had we kept silent instead of speaking. We can lead a successful life if we know how to speak. In modern days, there are so many courses to teach us how to speak in an attractive and impressive manner. Our tendency is to speak to impress others or to insist our own point of view. In the long run, it is important to know how our speech shapes us. It is equally important to know how the listener has valued our speech. Let us see how a good speech is viewed from a spiritual perspective for our well being and uplift.

Before we speak, we think. So, we need to have a clear mental attitude for a good speech. Bagavat Gita describes mental discipline as, "cheerfulness of mind, cheerfulness in expression, absence of pressure to talk, mastery over the mind and clean intent.” A contemplative person with the above qualities can speak well. How does this person speak?   There are five factors considered to form discipline of speech in Bagavad Gita: “Speech should not cause agitation; it should be true, pleasing, beneficial and a daily repetition of scriptures. Let us take each factor of speech discipline and see the benefits.

Non- agitating

The listener is given importance here. If the speaker causes agitation in the mind of the listener, the purpose of the speech is defeated. No communication can take place when the listener is agitated. There is no point in speaking when there is no attention from the listener. In our busy life we do not even think about the state of mind of the listener. With so many mobile phones around, the listener is perhaps already agitated with the previous speaker. We may also have to take care of this factor now! Whatever the method we follow regarding impressive speech, when the listener is agitated, what will he understand? So, when we start our speech, we need to be careful not to offend and agitate the listener.

True

Everyone speaks a lot about truth, but speaking truth is different. We are likely to compromise on this for temporary benefits. For speaking truth, we should know the real value of truth. Nothing else can be as valuable as truth. Every time we compromise on this we really lose a lot of mental peace and do great internal damage. Think of a person telling his friend a higher value for his house in a deal and making profit in a dishonest way. The lie will always come to his mind whenever he meets his friend. This person has split himself as a thinker and speaker. When the thinker is different from speaker, he is not himself. The value of truth is many times bigger than we normally think. Nothing can compensate truth.

 Pleasing

By speaking truth it does not mean that we can say anything and everything upfront. Our speech has to be true and also pleasing. One may not like the nose of his friend. It may be true. But is there the need to tell this to him?  It is very important that we exercise caution not to hurt the listener (These days we are often told to be frank and confrontational). We should use our discrimination. Every time we hurt someone by our speech, we are indirectly harming ourselves. We will be left with no one to listen to us in the end. People may listen to us when we are in power. But all powers are temporary. Further this will affect our spiritual goal and make life miserable in the final days. It is better we practice to speak in a pleasant manner. We also do a service by pleasant speaking as everybody loves such conversation.

 Beneficial

This indicates avoidance of unnecessary speech. When we speak, it should be meaningful and purposeful.   Our speech should always be beneficial to the listener, not just externally pleasing. This means our speech has to be honest. By this we develop compassion, an important value for living. Who would not like to listen to a speech when it is beneficial?

Daily practice

 In Vedic way life, every one belongs to a particular Veda (Rig, Yajur, Sama, Atharva) and chants his branch of the Veda every day. This trains the mind to focus and improves memory power. This practice keeps the Veda alive in its original form from generation to generation. In present day context, for those who have no opportunity to chant Vedas, repetition of prayers at a particular time can be a good practice. Any form of repetition brings discipline and makes us active. This is an exclusive time allotted to oneself to practice the best part of speech, speaking to the Supreme. Daily practice makes one perfect and the performance becomes spontaneous.

Value of discipline

The value of the above mental and speech discipline can be really appreciated if we think of our relationship with others. There is no one in this world, with who we are in complete agreement at all times. Even with the closest friend we have some difference at some point in time. Our likes and dislikes keep changing and disagreements are inevitable. Our only permanent relationship is with God. Spilt words cannot be taken back. Many top leaders, ministers and business men had lost their position because of hasty speech. There is no point in speaking something in haste and repenting later for that. The damage is already done.

There is something very interesting about the organ of speech, mouth. Only mouth has two functions. It has the function of action as well as knowledge which are known as karmendriya and jnanendriya. We taste when we eat, which gives knowledge of taste, hence it is instrument of knowledge. When we speak, mouth is an instrument of action. Therefore mouth is generally overworked. When we keep this also in mind, silence is sometimes needed. The one, who follows the above steps, keeps silence when appropriate and speaks only when necessary makes a good speaker.

-Arasu Ramanujam